My Muse.

I've been trying to deny it, but okay, here it goes:

I realized that I really, really need a muse for me to function properly. No excuses. It's just the way it is. This is me. And i accept it.

But then just when i thought that i've found my muse, she chose to disappear again. The irony.

And this time i'm worried that she'll dissappear.. forever..

I'm losing all hope.

Next week, i will be doing something that will confirm that i've returned to the dark side; and would probably help me move on. I'll probably regret it, but with this emptiness  i feel now? I think it would be worth it.

And if that day comes, and there's still no sign from her.. I will be the one to stop. And i will be the one to block any communications with her.

I'm sorry.