The Ronin

..it all happened so fast.
..i saw a facebook post from a former boss. he was looking for a potential instructor for game development subjects in his school. curious, i asked him about it; and just for the heck of it, i volunteered to apply. because YOLO.
..the head of the IT department of his school called me after just half an hour, and he wanted me to come by the school immediately.
..so the next day, i came. there were two applicants before me, already answering the standard questionnaire. i, on the other hand, scolded myself for not bringing a pen in an interview (doh!) so i had to borrow one from the HR herself. the questionnaire was composed of standard stuff -- info sheet, essay type questions, a personality exam. i got INFP, like always.. hah, i remembered her.

..strangely, even though i was the one who arrived last, i was the one to finish first.

..the HR then instructed me and the other applicants to wait. then, one by one, she called us and asked us to go to specific rooms for a teaching demo. i was a natural, of course (haha). so much for being an introvert. i nailed the teaching demo; and the panel of instructors were impressed (i think).

..i returned to the waiting room, and the other two applicants were already there. we were all done with our demos; and then, the HR showed up and called me first, yet again. the other applicants looked puzzled, but i ignored them and followed the HR.

..apparently, i was about to sign the contract.

..the HR told me that my presentation was approved by the panel of instructors, and i'm now officially hired. she showed me the contract; but then hesitated and asked if, aside from wednesdays, will i be available on saturdays too, for "specialists" class (professionals who just want to learn developing games because why not). thanks to me being impulsive i said "yes", so she had to edit the contract first and now my salary/rate per day got doubled in a snap.

..finally, i returned to the IT department head so that he could orient me. after the orientation, he introduced me to the dean. we shook hands, and he said, "FINALLY! A game development instructor!". :)

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..it's been one Wednesday and one Saturday of me teaching already; and so far, so good.

..oh, and i posted about this in facebook; and it garnered almost a hundred likes! that's a new record. they were congratulating me. they got inspired by me. they were happy for me.

..but for me? i feel that this victory is still... empty.

..why? probably because i'm like a ronin -- a samurai without a master. yes, hooray i have a new job; but, i did it just for the heck of it. i never needed this in the first place -- i have a lot of freelance jobs to finish. it's just that... i still have no purpose of doing all these. why not give job opportunities to those who need them -- like my ex-wife, for example. or other people who struggle to find jobs and yet can't seem to get lucky. they needed these opportunities more; don't cheer for me, don't congratulate me. -_-

.. just last night, a representative from the ANC (ABS CBN News Channel) called me and asked me for a televised interview re: pinoy-made apps; because apparently, the school where i work referred them to me and told them that i was an "app expert".

..i rejected it.

..because, hey, like i said, i don't deserve all these.

..someday, perhaps, when i have a reason to be what i am today. that day when i have someone to dedicate all these to; then okay.

..but for now, i'm just a ronin. minding my own business.

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PS. ..happy to say that i'm almost over her; but that's for another post. :)