I don't want to die (yet).

Last night i had a dream.

It was rather weird, at first. Me, along with my co-workers were fighting off this crazy, machine gun - weilding terrorist who was strangely inside our office. At one point i did the ultimate sacrifice and jumped on the said terrorist from a very high spot which killed him but in return, got me killed too.

Suddenly i felt light as the wind. One moment i found myself soaring through the sky, which means i was indeed dead and just a wandering spirit. After a minute or two of seemingly endless flying, I remembered my loved ones, and decided to pay them all a visit. I couldn't remember how i knew exactly where they were, but I managed to visit them one by one. I visited my best friend, my other friends, my relatives, my parents, and lastly, my wife and kid. It was actually fun seeing them without them seeing me; I even tried to make my presence felt but all i could do was make them feel cold. I realized that this was all I could do as a spirit. 

For a few days this was what i did. I smiled, laughed and symphatized with them as they experienced life through their daily activities. I was actually starting to really like being just a spirit. I was glad i died. But of course, all of them didn't know i was dead.

The sad news came to them one day, and suddenly everything changed. All of them were in pain, I saw them cry their hearts out over my portrait, or even before they slept at night. I tried comforting them but covering themselves with their arms or with blankets was the only reaction i got. 

I couldn't accept it. Why were they like this? Am i this special? Was I....loved ?

Confused, i decided to fly home. Here I saw my wife and my sleeping child. My wife was sitting on a chair, sobbing on the study table. I wanted to hug her, to tell her everything is okay, but i knew that with my present state this is nigh impossible. 

With my willingness as my only source of power i tried getting a pen on the table. Surprisingly, i managed to grasp it with my translucent hand. Near my crying wife i saw a piece of paper. I tried writing a message to her:

"Ma, can you feel my presence? Can you see what i'm writing?"

My wife heard the pen scribbling away by itself on the paper. She looked up and saw my message. She wasn't scared at all. 

She was smiling, albeit with tears on her eyes.

She excitedly got the pen and replied:

"Pa, is that you? "

"Yes, it's me. How's our son?"

"He's okay. He's too young to know what happened. "

"..Good."

"Pa, I'm so happy you're back, that you could do something like this. Can you stay with us forever? "

"...Ma.."

"I'm okay with this setup. I couldn't see you, but you can see us and we can talk through this pen and paper. This is more than enough. Just don't leave us."

"Ma, I'm not so sure..."

"We miss you. So much. I don't know if i could do this on my own. I can't imagine my life without you."

...

"I love you very much. Please don't let this be a dream. Please say you'll stay with us forever."

...

"Pa, are you still there? Please, please write something."

...

...

"Pa?"

...

"...Ma, I..miss you too. I miss you all. And I love you all very much..."

With that, we both cried. I cried like i never cried before. 

I wish I didn't die. I still wanted to be with my loved ones. I was too stupid to realize that they do care for me when i was alive. I wanted to change my ways, I finally learned that life is just too short and too precious to take for granted..

Please, let me stay.

Suddenly, I felt myself floating away. I saw my crying wife getting smaller and smaller. Until I was told that my days on earth as a spirit were finally over. 

I woke up, teary eyed. I quickly glanced over to my right to check if my wife and son were there. They were both sleeping quietly. I reached for my son and gave him a hug. I stood up and went over to my wife and kissed her.

Everything was a dream. I returned to bed and laid there, staring at the ceiling, smiling.

In a few hours another good day will come. This time, i will see everything in a different way. I am loved, and in return i will love them dearly.

I don't want to die, yet. No, not until I make all of my loved ones feel that i love them very much too. 

And that, my dear readers, will take a lifetime.